Lost Minutes

I wish I could count the minutes every day spent looking for specific toys that are necessary for bathing or sleeping or whatever activity is taking place at the moment. "Mom, I wanted the Woody with his hand up" - Silly me, it wasn't any of the 14 Woody's that we own and were in open sight. It was the one that was behind the couch because he was trying to keep it from his brother. What was I thinking?

This week I had to explain the rental movie concept. Needless to say, it was a complete failure. "I WANT YOGI BEAR!" In their defense, they had it yesterday and now Daddy took it to work. I'm sure they were thinking "WTF" in toddler thought (I haven't dropped that many f-bombs in front of them that they know that yet). That was a good 10 minutes lost there, not counting the minutes it took to download the movie from ITunes because I couldn't bear my own explaining any longer.

Explanations in general don't go well. I think, Hey they're 3 now - they should be able to rationalize. I mean, they are smart enough to hide a toy from their brother and smart enough to delay bedtime indefinately...surely they can understand that screaming at me won't get the desired outcome. I tried explaining to Peyton that screaming and slamming Mr. Potato Head when his eyes wouldn't go on didn't really solve anything. His response was 'I ike it' - that's how I feel sometimes too. I have to say I remember launching a Simon across the room when I was little. I mean who can remember past 15 beeps...seriously...that game is so rigged...I digress.


There was 120 minutes I lost a couple of weekends ago. Peyton wanted to see Rapunzel. I tried to talk him out of it but he would not be deterred. 120 minutes lost, but I got this..

Then there are those minutes that are lost all too quickly. "Mom, I love your beautiful hair.." I treasure every one of those minutes even though I can feel the pain down to my toes from him pulling my hair out by the roots. The unsolicited "I love you's" and the times when they play together and let their imaginations soar. Those are the lost minutes that really count and that I will remember fondly.

TImes two plus Anything Equals Mayhem

Multi-tasking used to be a strength. It was something I touted in interviews. Yes, I can do a spreadsheet, answer the phone, and check email all at once. It was and still is something I am very good at in my 'day' job. However, even attempting multi-tasking at home is just a recipe for disaster.

One such mistake happened just the other night. Usually, I get home with the boys and I make their dinner, give them a bath, etc. It is all very well timed, until I got the wild hair to actually try to make myself a real meal before they went to bed. Let me repeat - mistake!

The evening was going great. The boys played well, riding their scooters with their helmets (i.e. skull caps). Side note - Scott has already influenced them and they want to be skaters so badly. Anyway, there were minimal fights to break up that night; they ate well. All was going very smoothly. It was that false sense of calm that lured me into deciding to make dinner. The dinner of choice was pasta with mushrooms and broccoli. Really - not fancy at all. My biggest challenge was to boil water and throw pasta in it. I wasn't making some complicated dish that needed my undivided attention.

Picture the scene: The water is in and the stove is

set to high; the broccoli and mushrooms are on the skillet and it is now time to get the boys to brush their teeth and go to bed. That is where my multi-tasking skills fell apart. When you multi-task at work, you decide when to switch from one thing to another and while you are doing task B, task A isn't screaming at you. Tooth brushing went as well as it goes every other day - Grayson complied, Peyton complained. Then Grayson asked to watch yet another episode of Curious George. When I said 'no' the 2 year old tantrum erupted - crying, rolling on the floor. All over a monkey.

I could sense the water boiling and no pasta was in it yet. I run over to the kitchen and throw the pasta in. Meanwhile, Grayson is still screaming and Peyton is pouting because I made him brush his teeth. Back to Task A - "Boys, go to bed" - The answer in unison was 'NO'. Me - "GO TO BED!!" The answer in unison again - "NO!!".

Now the broccoli and mushrooms were starting to burn. I ran into the kitchen, stirred them, lowered the heat. Back to the boys. I say calmly, 'Boys, it's time for bed, let's lay down'. NO, they shouted. Task A is really getting out of hand. Task B is sizzling in the kitchen. I'm about to lose both tasks. It's like the boys knew I did not have 100% attention on them and they were going to let me know about it. There will be no multi-tasking when it comes to spending quality time with your kids. Even if that quality time is mere tooth brushing and singing a song for bed.

In the end, Scott came home to save the day. He calmed the boys down and got them to sleep while I saved our dinner.

Lesson learned: Do what I'm doing and nothing else. It's way more rewarding and way less stressful. It's one of the hardest lessons to learn for an obsessive person like me, and I will undoubtedly make the same mistake again. Family is first, then pasta.

Down Time? What down time?

I have a shirt that someone gave me when I was pregnant that says "Motherhood isn't for sissies." If that isn't the understatement of the millenium I dont know what is. I'll start my rant, I mean blog, by saying I have a great husband and a great support network, but sheesh it's still all so hard. I look around at other parents and wonder if they are as close to going insane as I am. I look at parents of older children, and wonder if they dealt with all the same issues. The answer to both questions, is of course, yes. Everyone who is a parent deals with all the same issues and feels like insanity is just one lost toy or one cry session away.

My current complaint is that there is just no downtime in my day. I get up and get the boys ready, get myself ready, get out the door, get them to school, go to work, go pick them up from school; and the cycle repeats. You would think I have it down by now and not be shocked that I don't sit down until 9pm. But every day, I wonder where all the time went. How did an entire day go by and all I got accomplished was that there are 12 toys on the ground now instead of 15? So, I count my successes --- the boys looked nice at school (A for getting them dressed), the boys ate their dinner (A for keeping them from starvation), I read them a book (A for contributing a little toward their intellectual well-being), I let them play outside and prayed that they wouldn't split up on me (A for trying...).

So 9pm it is....eat some dinner, split a Klondike with Scott, and fall asleep in the middle of a show.....Not a bad life!

Security & Food Inquiry

It's been a while since my last post and a lot has happened. Scott and I are under contract on a new house in Lutz near the boys' daycare and future schools. We close in a few weeks and we are very excited to have our 'first' house. Only non-first wives will understand the strong desire to get your own house with your husband. It's a special feeling and I think Scott and I both feel it the same way.

Enough of that...on to more exciting things, like making fun of the viejos. I don't know if other Cubans are this way so I can't blame the whole race without further research, but this place is like Fort Knox. There are bars on all the doors and windows and they are always locked. I mean - always! This is supposed to keep out burglars, but the key is hanging by a chain right next to the door. Hopefully there are no thieves reading this or I am in trouble. Scott and I have been sassed, very loudly I might add, on more than one occasion because we left one of the doors open. How can they not remember what I told them 2 hours ago, yet remember to lock the 72 doors before they leave. My aunt and uncle who live 20 feet away don't come over for dinner without locking up their house like they are going away for 2 weeks. I guess there is something to be said for security, but I really don't want to get caught in here during a fire.

As I write this, the boys are eating their dinner. Before the night is out, I guarantee you I will be asked no less than 3 times about their eating for the day. Did they eat lunch? What did they eat for dinner? Did they drink their milk? Ayyyee, they don't eat! Eating is definately a Cuban thing. It's just like that line in My Big Fat Greek Wedding...'you dont eat no meat?.....we make lamb'. Insert "lechon" or "palomilla" and we have the Cuban version of that movie. Everything can be fixed with food and again throwing away food goes against their grain. It doesn't matter if the food in question has been in the refrigerator for 2 weeks, the dog can eat it, or the squirrels can eat it, but it will not go to waste. Cally (our Boxer) has to lose 11 lbs because of this 'don't throw food away' policy. Expiration dates are just guidelines - according to my people, those dates are only put there so that they can sell more. Surree, that mayonnaise is still good. YOU eat it. But again, they've survived and I'm called Flojita. That's ok, I would rather be called Flojita than eat something expired.

PS - I've already been asked one of those food questions as I finished that last paragraph.

Technology

Technology has come a long way in the last 10 years, and usually viejos don't keep up as they should. This is just not true with my peeps. My mom has a cellphone with unlimited texting, a facebook account, DVR, a digital camera, a camcorder, a bluetooth and a Skype account. They all play an important role in her life. I don't get as many phone calls in a week of working than she gets in one day. And the phone cannot be answered if she doesn't have her bluetooth in. Picture it: phone rings, Mom goes running across the house, and instead of answering it, she fumbles for the bluetooth to get it in her ear. Then she says "se callo la llamada" -- the call dropped. Well, it didn't really drop so much as it took her too long to get the damn bluetooth in. JUST ANSWER THE PHONE! It was probably my aunt saying it was time for CAFE.

Texting is another area in which my Mother excels. She wants it to be as instantaneous as phone calls though. She gets mad if she texts you and you don't respond within 30 seconds. We were at Disney the other day in line for Small World and I look behind us and there's Leonor walking at a snail's pace texting. There is a huge crowd forming behind her. She almost caused a riot, but she had to get that text out! Important business awaited - !

All this technology has definately affected the boys. They know about YouTube and want to watch 'Funny Bear' and 'Elephants Jumping' (there is a clip about an elephant jumping on a trampoline...I don't know why...but that's another story). The other day Peyton brought me the mouse while I was in the bathroom and said "Funny Bear?" Really, seriously, come on!

They also know we have access to just about any show they want to watch. There will be none of this just turning the TV on and watching what is currently playing. They will specifically tell you what they want to watch and demand you play it.

All in all, technology is great and I"m glad my mom is on board; I just have to make sure any pictures taken of me are good because they will be on her Facebook account and emailed out to 25 people within 24 hours!

Just keep the line moving, Mom!

Noise

We Cubans are not known for our soft spoken nature. I also happened to marry someone that has a loud voice. So between the boys screaming fests, the telephone ringing, and YO Gabba Gabba in the background, we live in a very loud environment.

As I said before my aunt and uncle live next door. My mom and my aunt talk several times a day, both in person and on the phone. If it's not a call for CAFE! (espresso for the crackers), it's my aunt asking if there's any stale bread for the squirrels (seriously). And as if the constant phone ringing isn't enough, my mom has figured out the speaker phone function. There is no phone that touches her ear becauseshe is also a bluetooth owner. The other day, I heard my aunt dial my mom (on speaker) from the living room of the SAME HOUSE. I couldn't help but laugh at the echo effect of each of their voices talking about.....I dont remember - I'm sure it was something about Tupperware.

Anyone with kids knows how precious a nap is. The viejos believe that noise is good for a sleeping child. "They have to get used to it", they say. This was apparent when I had just gotten the boys down for a nap last weekend and my uncle decided it was a good time to install new shower doors in the bathroom across the hall. Come on people!

Today is Friday and the weekend begins. We will have a full house with Jack and Alaina coming over tonight. I'm sure I will get lots of material for my next post.

Til then.

Twins and Viejos

Hi! I started this blog to write down some of the funny and not so funny happenings over the next 6 months or so as my family lives with my mom. Our family consists of twin 2 year old boys named Peyton and Grayson, a Boxer named Cally, and regular visits by Jack and Alaina, who are 13 and 8. We made two cross country moves and need some time to recover financially. Enter the viejos (for you crackers out there, viejos means old people).

My mom has graciously opened her doors and let us move in until we can get back on our feet. In typical Cuban style, my aunt and uncle live right next door, complete with little stepping stones between the houses. Peyton and Grayson love it because they can call Abi and Tata when they are told 'no' by one of us.

It has been one week that we have been living there and all is going well. Unpacking was very interesting because I found stuff I thought I had thrown away. Those viejos are good - no garbage is safe. If you want to get rid of something that has any semblance of use left, you better burn it, or those viejos will find it and it will be sitting on your dresser when you get home. We relocated many items I didn't even know I had.

I think the best example during our move was the coffee filters. While packing up in Phoenix, there were some coffee filters in the pantry. I told my aunt we didn't need them anymore because our new coffee make used the cone kind. I said "just throw them away" foolishly thinking she would. In Tampa, I'm unpacking the 700th box, and what do I see -- coffee filters. So I take them out and throw them away. The next day I overhear a conversation that included these phrases: "what kind of coffee filters does your coffee maker use", "what about so and so," " let me call around and see," "we just can't throw them away," "someone can use them." After many calls to the Cuban Community to see who had the correct coffee maker, the proud recipient of the $3 package of coffee filters that travelled 2500 miles was the convent!! Of course, we Cubans have connections everywhere!